Friday, October 26, 2018


Hello everyone.

My name is Steeven, and I read on the toilet.

And really, is that so wrong?

Is it?

Because if I go by the folks I interact with on a daily basis, it is.

People seem to have a real problem with it. In fact, some folks have a real problem with the bathroom in general. Why are they so uptight?

For example, I'm heading to the restroom the other day and I pass a fella in the hall, this is a guy I know, and he asks me:

"Where you off to?"

So I reply with:

"Gotta pee."

To which he gets all uncomfortable and says:

"OK, that was way too much information."

Really? Was it really too much information? Because I'm sure I could have gone into much more detail.

How should I reply when asked again so as not to make him uncomfortable?


Slot car racing?

Origami lessons?

I don't know, I suppose I could have just said I was going to the restroom. Could it be possible that he had an issue with the word "pee"? I mean, it's the sixteenth letter in our alphabet. Does he go through life omitting that one letter in his correspondence?

Am I making more of this than I really should?

Because I don't think I am.

Frankly, I'm sick and tired of being ostracized for wanting to take those few moments in life where I get to be by myself to enjoy a good book. Why is that so wrong?

The fact of the matter is, people, we all poop. Each and every one of us. No one wants to talk about it, but we do it every day.

We don't seem to have a problem showing toilet paper commercials where someone pours a beaker of blue water onto a strip a toilet paper, then adds a roll of quarters atop it to show how strong their toilet paper is. Well guess what, folks. The quarters represent poop.

I actually have people burst into fits of giggles when they see me go into the restroom with a book under my arm. Yeah, okay, I mean, I might as well be holding a sign saying "I'm going to be a while!" But I like to read and the toilet in the perfect place to get some of that done.

And God forbid anyone see me carrying a large, hardback novel into the restroom.

I'm here, I read on the toilet, and I'm not going anywhere.

Get used to it.


Get it?

Photo by Hafidz Alifuddin from Pexels

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